I like this post from Nancy, our resident Astrologer.  There is a calming confidence and sure-footedness, like a goat’s hooves navigating slippery rocks that I relate to when I read her words of advice.  Thank you Nancy!!  Your posts prepare me for the upcoming energies and make me feel less crazy in my head.

The New Moon for January 2010 is on the 15th of the month at 2:12 AM — it is at 25 degrees of Capricorn, so all day long is just perfect for writing down your affirmations and wishes. The loving planet Venus is within orb of this New Moon, so be open to love, forgiveness, random acts of kindness, and  be aware of those in need.  There is a karmic quality to this New Moon that might begin a new cycle for many Capricorns, and those with planets in the sign Capricorn.  Check out your chart and see where Capricorn lies — each house has a special meaning — and this could give you a clue as to where your energy should be spent.

This new year has begun with many delaying aspects in the Heavens, for instance it began with a Mercury Retrograde already in place — this aspect is always a bit tumultuous because it affects communication, transportation, educational matters, publishing and many day-to-day activities.  It is always a good rule of thumb to take our time when planning trips, using our car in bad weather, depending on mass transportation, or signing up for new classes.  Just about anything can be delayed or misconstrued when we are under this aspect.  Double check plans, places to meet, and make sure your car is up to snuff for the rigors of the winter weather (keep an emergency pack in your car: flashlight, water, cell phone, blanket or extra warm coat, AAA phone #, and even jumper cables), any and all of these items just might  be needed.  And make sure your gas tank is at least half full at all times.

In addition, Mars is also in Retrograde mode — this planet is our enthusiasm, energy and passion.  When retrograde, it also hinders new projects, relationships, finding jobs, and especially any “improvement” in our physical being. All of those good intentions that we hoped would emerge in this new year are bound to see delays and conflicts.  These aspects, however, do allow us to reconsider our goals and really look into what it is we truly want for ourselves this year.  Ask yourself the difficult questions now — am I where I want to be, where do I want to be in 5, 10 or even 20 years?  Am I happy doing what I am doing?  Are my relationships fulfilling and loving?  How am I going to reach those goals that I have been striving for over the past few years?  What will make me the contented, happy person I deserve to be?  What do I have to do, get, learn, find, or develop so that I might be finally on the true pathway that will be in my best interest, and will allow me to become my highest and most spiritual self?

Also, just so we don’t get too cozy — thinking all will be well after Mercury goes direct — Saturn, the teacher of our planetary system, will also go Retrograde in the sign Libra on the 13th and it will last until May 30th – enhancing the confusion, and reminding us to stay on course.   It will be so easy to throw in the towel and go astray… but remember what you have to gain by staying on course — you will succeed, you will get to your goals, and you will become that fulfilled person you want to become.  Saturn is the ruler of Capricorn, and as such will provide us with that extra impetus to keep our focus — and we will be happier in our relationships, our jobs, and more satisfied with life in general just by keeping to the straight and narrow confines of being honorable, and of doing the right thing.

OK — now if all of that information isn’t enough — the New Moon also ushers in an eclipse — so this will be a much more impactful and longer lasting cycle.  We may find ourselves with more responsibility and we must be able to accept these new parameters whether in our jobs or in our homes.  There will be times when you feel out of control, and that’s when you must not abandon your good common sense.  Don’t give in to those riotous feelings that will spiral your life out of control… You hold the keys to your behavior and your life — hold on to them dearly — and you will be rewarded with opportunities and choices that will be better for you in the long run.   Capricorn doesn’t move swiftly — this is a slow and steady sign, and with Saturn as its ruler — you know there will be rewards, and they will be worthwhile.

The Capricorn sun will hook up with the North Node between the 5th and the 19th and this will help give us the power to be in control of our lives.  In addition, Jupiter is rapidly going through the last degrees of Aquarius connected to Neptune — this will enhance in us a deep feeling that all will be well, no matter what limiting circumstances we will have to overcome.  When Jupiter enters Pisces late on the 17th we will be imbued with a new fervor — our spirits will be uplifted, and we will be empowered to expand our universe.  We will be able to see the “Big” picture — we can push aside the petty problems that don’t add to our sense of well-being.  Our eyes will be open to new pathways — just be sure you are not wearing your rose-colored glasses — be perfectly clear in your mind as to where you are going.  If something sounds too good to be true — steer clear!  Stay true to the practical and beautiful things you know are real and worthwhile.

The New Moon is at 25 degrees of Capricorn on January 15th, at 2:12 AM.  All day is fine for writing out your affirmations and wishes, be as specific as you can — repeat your affirmations for any difficult goals you have that might take longer to manifest.  Capricorn is a practical sign — so any wishes for more control over your life, or getting organized, or perhaps returning to basics are all good.  Capricorn will help you with the patience to reach your goals, and it enhances your endurance, so you will have the strength to conquer any obstacles along your path.

The power is in the ether — it is there for the taking – reach for the stars and you will begin to see your potential as a child of the Universe.  May this new year 2010 bring the awesome power within your spirit into the light — and may you be able to manifest your abilities, so that you will be aware of the magical being that is you.

PS.  Next month’s new Moon ushers in the Chinese New Year (sign of the Tiger) – more on that subject next month…. xo

Tags: Aquarius, feeling out of control, January 15, Jupiter in Pisces, Mars in Retrograde, Moon Eclipse, Neptune, new Moon in Capricorn, North Node, Retrograde Mercury 2010, Retrograde Saturn, Saturn in Libra, you hold the keys to your behavior

I know I have mentioned about the Drumfish circle of drummers led by Ed Runeigh.  This group meets in Fairhaven, MA and I look forward to Ed’s emails every couple of weeks letting me know about the next get together.  The Unitarian Memorial Church is a phenomenal piece of architectural history, making the acoustics awesome!  A donation of $5 is all it takes to play for hours, and all levels of musicians or would be musicians are welcome.  Ed generously supplies many variations of drums if you don’t own one – so what are you waiting for??  GO! Make music!!

In Ed’s words:

Well it’s about time.  Long, cold nights of no drum circle. Desperate hours trapped without an outlet for those deep rhythmic urges.  Take heart my fidgety, percussive friends for liberation is at hand.

Sunday, January 10th and it’s the first Drumfish circle of 2010!

Drum, shaker, rattle, bell, stick and stone, harp, flute, didge and trumpet, chant, song, dance.  All elements of a great drum circle night and a guaranteed relief from any wintery, post holiday blues that may have set in along with the cold and the snow.  (Ok, it’s really pretty and the holidays are heartwarming and all but give me June, any day)

Unitarian Memorial Church, 102 Green St, Fairhaven.  Doors open at 7 PM.   Heat should be working by 8.

Tags: drum circle fairhaven, drumfish, Ed Runeigh, Fairhaven drummers, Unitarian Memorial Church

One of the worst things anyone could do in my presence is NOT listen to me when I say something seriously.

We all have someone in our lives who tries to diminish your statements of power.  When I state something with a firm tone, Ms./Mr.Diminisher responds with their personalized version of what “you really mean”.  Responses of “You don’t really feel that way!!” or the inevitable, “You don’t mean that!!!” are akin to waving a red flag in this bulls face.

Ever since I was a little girl, I have known who I was.  I have full command of the power of my words.  I know my own mind and I know how to express it.  Why this has been challenged throughout my lifetime remains a mystery to me.  It’s as if others somehow feel obligated to answer for me, or re-edit my words.  Big mistake.

In my late thirties I was briefly dating a man who was a friend of my fathers.  Briefly is the operative word here.  For some reason this man, let’s call him Mr. Yawn, felt entitled to keep invading my privacy by showing up at my home and asking that I make him coffee, or lunch/dinner.  Mr. Yawn only talked about himself- constantly.  Because of his charming ways he never connected that his drinking problem coupled with his inability to tell the truth stood in the way of any healthy relationship with the opposite sex.  In short, he was an invasive, egotistical, boring, selfish, attractive, funny pest.

One evening he showed up at my home totally inebriated and I asked him to leave.  Promising me that he would be on his way, if he could only use the bathroom facilities, I acquiesced.  After twenty minutes I scaled the stairs to the second floor to find him PASSED OUT DRUNK IN MY BED!  This infuriated me.  Try as I might I could not wake Mr. Yawn.  Shouting and pushing him did not rouse him from his drunken slumber.  It was at this point that my sense of right and wrong somehow separated.

I reached over, with matches in hand, and set the pillow case that he was resting his head upon on fire.  Now, dear readers, in retrospect I can understand how crazy happens.  I am living proof.  But at the moment, my thoughts were clear.

Mr. Yawn you have disrespected me, and I know of a way to make you move!

Sitting on the floor, cradling my knees to my chest I stared calmly at his face.  The flames began to slowly flicker and gather height, I whispered, “Fire.  Fire.”

I embraced my successful strategy, as Mr. Yawn’s eyes flew open as he jumped onto the floor, pulling the offending pyro-pillow off the mattress.  He ran into the bathroom with it, threw it in the tub and turned the water on, all the while screaming how I was a crazy woman and didn’t I know I could have killed him!  Yes, well I knew that, but I didn’t care.

For years I kept the burned pillow case as a reminder, not of how crazy I could become, but of how I was justified to use all means possible to rid myself of invasive, overbearing pests.

Several years elapsed before Mr. Yawn started showing up to reprise his role as an egotistical bore.  No matter where I moved to he would find me.  No matter where I was working, he would show up.  I tried valiantly to work on my inner calm, and have compassion.  I kept telling myself that perhaps I owed Mr. Yawn some karmic debt, and maybe it was payback for some awful thing I had done in a past life.

Throughout the years I have had to endure listening to Mr. Yawn’s scams of how he bilked hundreds of thousands of dollars from his family and friends, of which he has none now.  Showing mercy, when he needed a place to stay for “one night”, turned into several nights of him ranting non-stop, never sleeping, with paranoid delusions coupled with visions of revenge all the while scaring the heck out of my children.  I wanted to believe he was harmless, but knew crazy when I saw it, and knew I wasn’t equipped to play psychiatric nurse.

The last three months of 2009 found me deep within a spiritual abyss and physical sickness.  And in some Universe’s rule of balance, when your Soul sends out the signal that you are teetering on the brink of life, the vultures somehow sense the possibility of death and find you.

The early part of November I was beginning to realize how deathly sick I felt.  Sitting in my favorite chair, wrapped up with a blanket, not caring how I looked, a knock came upon my front door.  There stood Mr. Yawn asking if I would make him coffee.  I had not seen him in seven years.  In a weak voice I explained I wasn’t feeling very well, which a blind man could have deduced.  Did that stop the bore?  The bore whose only intent was to prattle on about himself for hours?  Not one bit.  Like the indentured karmic servant I am, still wrapped in my blanket, I shuffled to the stove and made coffee.  Throwing cookies on a plate I delivered food and drink as he sat regally at my dining room table.  Throwing myself back on my chair I tried in vain to tune his exaggerated tales out of my consciousness.

Towards the end of November another unwelcomed visit from Mr. Yawn haunted my doorstep.  My Washingtonian, “I cannot tell a lie”, son-in-law answered the door and in a protective moment informed him that I was out with friends, when in fact I was curled up on a couch not fit to seen.  My patience had reached an end.  I could not fathom what these unwarranted visits were about.  It’s not as if he ever asked about my life, or cared.  These visits were a platform for Mr. Yawn to spin his tales of nonsensical reality.  A reality that was all too distance from my own.

The 360 degree crazy came mid-December.  My daughter was waiting for a friend to arrive, when the knock came upon my door.  She opened it, and there he stood – like Poe’s Raven, which I seethed silently, “Nevermore!”

I traversed fifteen feet of floor in one jump.  Screaming at this invasive specter I held his arm and turned him to the stairs to retreat to whatever borrowed vehicle he had arrived in.  “What do you want?  Why are you here?  When have you ever, EVER cared about anyone but yourself?  Never, EVER visit this place again!  If you should see me anywhere in this world avert your eyes, you do not KNOW ME!”, I heard myself shout.  My daughter, taken by surprise at my display of anger ran to her bedroom.  The air crackled with electricity, and Spirits were thankful that I had spared his life.

Recovering a few days later from expending what strength I had, I was relating this story to a friend, who said to me, “Oh, don’t worry you didn’t mean it.”  I slowly closed my eyes and made a quick excuse to end the call.

To all that know how much I hold Sacred Words to my heart – when you have had enough of crazy in your life throw it out the door and far away from you.  Throw your voice to the six directions and empower yourself to distinguish what you want and do not want in your life and shout at the wolf to stay far, far away or you will strike it down.  By doing so you will begin to heal the fragments from long ago.

Tags: being physically sick, crazy comes full spectrum, I cannot tell a lie, insufferable bores, Nevermore, Poe's Raven, saying what you mean, six directions, throwing your voice

After a very extensive talk today with my niece (AM) there left no doubt that genetic imprinting of our DNA is strongly interwoven within our family tree.  She is, in many ways, so like me.  She is a tough, strong, intelligent woman.  So am I.  So was my father’s mother, and HER mother, as is my daughter, as is her daughter.  I’m sure there should be some begets and begots in here, but I can’t be bothered to figure out how to work them in.  We are a matriarchal force that will not be ignored.

My niece and I share some very common ground when it comes to suffering fools – we don’t.  People are amazed that I am still single after all these decades.  Not me.  I KNOW why I’m alone.  Do you want the list?

I “see” through men.  I SEE them, what their hearts hold.

I have zero tolerance for falseness.

I believe myself to be intellectually superior to most men I meet.

I am difficult to live with, because basically no man can really teach me anything.

I don’t look at men; I could get side-tracked and end up in a Turkish bath – the inhabitants of which would go unnoticed to me.

I think size matters; as do most women….(sorry guys, Truth is painful).

I could give a rat’s behind what people think of me. (This could be the Aspie in me.)

Once I’m done with a man I am DONE.

I secretly voice alternative conversations in my head if I’m with a guy who is boring.

I am too direct and often hear conversations that go something like this:

Him: Oh my GAWD Jone, you’re SO FUNNY!

ME: (With a deadpan expression) “No, really it’s over!  I’m not going on one more date while your mother insists on coming to dinner, cuts your food, then sits between us at the movies!”

Him: You SLAY meeeeee! (Tears of laughter in his eyes).  So should Mum and I pick you up tomorrow at seven?

I think it would be helpful if everyone wore armbands.  Men AND women.  In this way we could, at a glance, be more diplomatically inclined to gravitate towards people of our own tribe and eliminate all the exhaustive and emotional go-arounds while trying to wade through the honeymoon period of dating.

Armbands with Colour Identifications

Yellow – liar, cheat, bad breath, smoker, alcoholic, drug user, lives at home

Blue – sensitive, likes to go the beach/mountains/hiking, can fix a leaky faucet, enjoys snow shoveling, likes to kill bugs

Red -  has a temper, favorite character in literature Peter Pan, deeply religious with no tolerance for religious beliefs other than their own, bigot/many prejudices

Orange – organic foods only, vegetarian or variation thereof, pet lover, loves children

Half a rainbow – heterosexual on the down low

Grey – likes to borrow your under things, unclear what gender they really are, can decorate your living area better than you can

White – esoteric, avid reader, enjoys museums and an occasional café au lait, thinks facial hair is disgusting

Green – likes to grow things, has long hair, resonates with Native American beliefs, likes to drum, and appreciates international music, owns a didgeridoo

Purple – lives in the Astral plane

I hope this idea of mine catches on – it would make life so much easier by identifying the “Come hithers”  from the “GO aways!”

Tags: armbands, DNA, identifying people we want to date, intellecturally superior, liars, matriarchal, size matters, Turkish bath, zero tolerance for falseness